Unresolved – Part 15
About: Kevin and Scotty
Disclaimer: Not mine. Just messing with the characters if B&S
Summary: Set in the episode Resolved because they still got back together too quickly on the show so I’m filling in the gaps for myself.
The credits rolled and he could feel Kevin stoically pick up the control that he had placed on the armrest and switch the film off. Scotty wanted to stay in the position for longer but the tension that he could feel in Kevin was unnerving him; he had to get up and face Kevin and so he did.
He turned to face Kevin and the anger that he had expected to see in his face wasn’t there; it was replaced by something just as bad, sadness. Scotty had thought the film had been sweet and loving so he didn’t understand the reaction from Kevin.
Kevin could see the confusion in Scotty’ face and he explained “They were so happy” he said sadly.
“And?” Scotty asked wanting an explanation.
“No one stays that happy, bring out a sequel of the film and they wouldn’t still be together” Kevin remarked; not anger nor sad but just what he actually believed.
Scotty processed the information he had just received from Kevin; from what he understood, Kevin was sad about the fact that no one stayed happy. Neither in the film nor in real life; Scotty could understand the similarities that were being compared by Kevin.
Scotty rushed to defend their relationship “But we can be” Scotty tried to explain but Kevin interrupted him “Why should we have to, so we can be happy again and in return we can go through all this pain again, is it really worth it” Kevin asked remarkable calm and in his opinion completely realistic.
“No” Scotty said complete shocked; where had this reaction come from, he was shaking his head as he continued to speak “So we can be happy again and not make the same mistakes again” Scotty thought about all they had gone through recently and he was determined that they were starting to make their way back to each other.
But Kevin, being the lawyer that he was, had a retort “So we can make new ones instead, maybe next time it will be me sleeps with an client instead of the chef with a waiter” he laughed at the remark, he really did think that the waiter was too obvious for Scotty, to cliché and predictable.
Scotty was so taken back by the comment that he couldn’t think of anything to say but he didn’t have to worry Kevin was still there to speak.
“I still can’t believe you did that” Scotty couldn’t believe about how calm Kevin was acting throughout this whole conversation “I can’t believe that I let it happen” Kevin got up of the sofa and looked around lost and out of place “I’m going to bed; I think I want to be allow”.
This time it was Scotty that took the sofa; Kevin had brought out sheets and a blanket for Scotty, he barely even registered what he had done. Scotty took them gratefully, this is the reaction that he expected from Kevin when he first told him, Scotty was fighting the mixed feelings inside him; anger, sadness, regret mixed with guilt, expectance and acceptance.
He lay on the sofa and crawled up in a bowl, the sofa was too small for him to lie down straight on it anyway. The nervousness and excitement of renewing their commitment to each other and finally having some real intimacy was completely blown away by Kevin’ latest emotion rollercoaster.
He cried himself to sleep, what had happened during that film, Scotty didn’t fully understand but he felt that he was losing Kevin all over again.
If he had got up and gone into their room he would have found a very confused Kevin crying throughout the night. Not understanding what he had just done but finally feeling the deep impact on their relationship; the happy time, the sad, miscarriage with Michelle, losing Robert, the crash, Aaron, Saul. Kevin cried out all the tears he had and still was shaking with the need to cry but not having anymore inside of him to dispel.
Scotty shakes Kevin awake; it’s lunchtime but he wanted to check on Kevin. Scotty’s internal clock had woken Scotty up in time to get downstairs and into the kitchen just before any of his staff had gotten in.
Scotty had kept an eye on the door that lend up to their apartment and was shocked to not see Kevin come down; though his case load was still small due to the time off that he had prepared for to help Scotty out through Saul’ trip but Kevin always went to his office.
When he had time; just before the lunch rush Scotty quickly went up to the apartment to check on Kevin; once in their room he could see that Kevin had had a difficult night too, he had gone to sleep in his clothes, his face was tightly screwed up; as if in pain.
Scotty was tempted not to wake him but he wanted to remind Kevin about their appointment at the counsellors for later in the day. He knew that they needed this; especially after last night.
“Kev, hun” Scotty said gently as he lend over and placed a small kiss on his forehead “time to get up” as he again gently rock on Kevin shoulders.
Kevin blinked his eyes and kept blinking until his eyes could fully open and he stared into his husband eyes as the memory of the night before came flushing back. Scotty watched as he saw Kevin disappear; his eyes were a blank mystery.
Kevin straighten up onto the bed and couldn’t look Scotty in the eyes; his confidence in their relationship was shaken, maybe even shattered, he didn’t even know where to look so he said to Scotty offhandedly “Yes?” he asked that one word knowing that Scotty would either get anger with him or reply just as solemnly.
“Beth appointment at five, meet me outside at four thirty” Scotty knew that the direct approach was the only way to handle Kevin in this particular situation. He waited until he saw Kevin give him a noncommittal nod before he left the room and the apartment without saying anything or looking backwards.
The journey to the counsellors’ building was silent and extremely awkward; they were both relieved to get out of the car and inside the building; they rushed towards her office but must have been early, the little red light was showing which meant that she was still with other clients.
They anxiously looked and hopped around the waiting room until the last client left and she motioned for them to come in. Beth could tell that something was wrong; something had occurred in the last few days since their previous meeting that has caused a strain on their relationship. This time it was both of them that sat apart; she could tell that both wanted to sit closer together but they didn’t. Kevin looked lost and Scotty was looking lost too; with a mixture of resentment whenever he looked at Kevin, Kevin was refusing to look at Scotty at all.
“So, what happened?” Beth asked directing the question at Scotty; out of the two of them she knew that Scotty was more forth coming with answers, especially to direct questions but this time it seemed that Scotty wasn’t answering.
“Ask him?” Scotty exclaimed as he pointed his thumb towards Kevin; Kevin jolted back and the anger that was clear in Scotty’ voice.
“Kevin?” Beth asked gently
End of Part 15